4.30.2008

The Heretic Bard

So I was thinking about what you said, "Peeve-Poetry" or something, so I decided to try it out. It's terribly terribly out of line w/what Joe Public thinks. It's awesome! So here's my attempt at pop culture peeve poetry...

We Will Outlaw Nature's Law

Miley Cyrus fell from grace
because she showed more than her teenage face
and a tightly jean-clad bottom...
It was the naked back that got'em
smooth and white and completely bare
forget that the girl has pubic hair
and has no doubt gotten her menses
Society puts up fences
between "woman" and "child"
So we will not dwell
on the fact that at twelve
her body was probably ready for mating
Our society says dating
should wait and degrading
oneself with sex tapes and such
should be done at a later date (if not much)
And if she hungers for touch
let her feel shame
if her body cries for sex
let her feel shame
if she masturbates in the darkness
let her feel shame
because we say she isn't ready.
Now, make her pretty
and put her back out on the stage
make sure she acts her age
flirting sweetly, gently
saving the split beaver shot 'til she's twenty.

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